Wednesday, April 29, 2009


I woke up this morning, worked out (kind of), took a shower, got ready, and then felt like I could get into this position
at any moment.

Ryan was away last night for some work training sessions, which meant I was solo.

When he's gone overnight I don't sleep. At all. It's pretty awful. I need a nighlight on and get up every hour to make sure the bedroom door is still locked and no one is standing over me - staring at me. I know it sounds ridiculous, and it is, but I just can't help it!

I'm not sure where this fear has stemmed from, I've never had a bad experience...just an innate fear of being alone at night. When I lived alone in an apartment two summers ago I kept a light permanently on in the living room, slept with my bedroom door locked, and a fan on so I couldn't hear anyone come in (in the off chance they did) so I could get some shut eye.

It's so annoying.

I think I'll take a nap this afternoon and hope that the next time he's away I'll be able to sleep a little!

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